Jerry Jones: The Man Who Laughs

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June 11, 2013; Irving, TX, USA; Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones talks during a press conference after minicamp at Dallas Cowboys Headquarters. Mandatory Credit: Matthew Emmons-USA TODAY Sports

Ha. Ha. Aha. He, he. Aho. He. Ha.

This is Jerry Jones at his very, very best.

Of the top 10 most watched NFL games of the 2013 campaign, The Dallas Cowboys not only topped the list, they also landed on it five times.

Yes, five. Their final record was 8-8 (in case you tuned out).

  1. Raiders/Cowboys – Thanksgiving Day
  2. Packers/49ers – Sept. 8
  3. Broncos/Cowboys – Oct. 6
  4. Packers/Lions – Thanksgiving Day
  5. Broncos/Chiefs – Dec. 1
  6. Cowboys/Giants – Nov. 24
  7. Packers/Cowboys – Dec. 15
  8. Seahawks/49ers – Dec. 8
  9. Eagles/Cowboys – Dec. 29
  10. Eagles/Broncos – Sept. 29

Jones is absolutely correct on his personal assessment that his best body of work is today, and within the last few years. Right on, Jerry.

The trilogy is complete: The Dallas Cowboys failed to win three elimination games in a row. So, it is official now — Jerry Jones has mastered the art of mixing broadway and stupidity.

This dude is an idiot. He must have struck his Botox needle a little too deep one night, thus tampered his brain. What an idiot.

Jerry Jones now has enough credibility to rule the galaxy longer than Darth Vader’s Master. And it looks like Jerry will. Great. Just great. Now we know why Yoda booked a hotel in a mud ditch.

The function of Jerry Jones today, yesterday, and beyond is to entertain, to stay relevant, to sell tickets, and to give the fans what he calls a “show.”

Thanks, Mr. Jones, but some of us don’t consider beating Kim Kardashian in television ratings a success.

Blasphemy.

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