Criminal, You're God Damn Right. We'll Take Him!!!!


“Please Lord, this boy needs Jesus
Heal this child, help us destroy these demons
Oh, and please send me a brand new car
And a prostitute while my wife’s sick in the hospital”

–Eminem

I am not sure why Eminem’s song is a fitting introduction to this post other than for its raunchy lyrics and complete disrespect for people. Let’s give this a shot–I mean chance– anyway.

Adam “Pacman” Jones is a Dallas Cowboy.

The Cowboys have had bad boys on the team before. Hollywood Henderson, Nate Newton and Michael Irvin are just a few of the former Cowboys players who have had run ins with the law. But never have they had the likes of a Pacman. Is the Game Over?

Not so fast…

Six arrests later and many nights of strippers, face slaps and concealed weapons, Pacman wants us to believe he has turned a new leaf. He’s donated $500,000 to charity. He’s made new friends. He’s ready to play football.

Let’s just pretend what he says is from the heart. Let’s just pretend that Pacman behaves and his skills have not diminished. This may be the biggest move the Cowboys have made in the off season since the Herschel Walker trade on Oct. 12, 1989. Pacman was a top-notch corner in the NFL, feared for his quickness and coverage skills. But maybe more distinguishing was Pacman, the punt returner. The Cowboys haven’t had that kind of threat since Deion Sanders. After a 13-3 season and three wins away from a record sixth Super Bowl, it was obvious to every single fan that the Cowboys lacked depth in the secondary. We were pulling guys from the practice squad and stealing players from the third string benches of other teams. Not anymore. Barring no injuries and good attitudes, not any freaking more.

The Cowboys just filled a huge need with a quality player for a 4th round pick. Now who is committing the crime, suckers?

As the draft weekend approaches, and now that Pacman is in Blue and Silver, Jerry Jones has two first-round picks to play with. He no longer NEEDS a cornerback in the first round.

Are his eyes set on the Razorback? Is Darren McFadden back on the radar?

Dick's Sporting Goods presents "Hell Week":

Tags: Adam "Pacman" Jones Cowboys And Titans Dallas Cowboys Dallas Cowboys And Pacman PacMan Jones

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