Will Antonio Pierce Guarantee A Win?

Who ducktaped the mouth of Giants linebacker Antonio Pierce? Or is it just too early for this fuzzberry to start trash talking? Let’s rewind: Before the Dallas Cowboys faced the Giants in Week 1, Pierce opened his mouth; stupid things came out. Read them here.

After the Cowboys won that game 45-35, Pierce was pretty quiet. Then, the Cowboys played the Giants again. First place in the NFC East was at stake. Dingleberry opened his mouth again, and you can read it here.  

There’s a pattern here, though. Every time he opens his yapper, the Cowboys whoop the living hell out of the Giants. Go figure, right?

As we approach this playoff game Sunday, you can hear a pin drop over in New Jersey-New York. The stench of the trash-laden neighborhoods around the ball park hovers in the air.

But there’s history here: Never before have the Giants and Cowboys met in a playoff. The two most-famed quarterbacks from these two teams, Phil Sims and Troy Aikman, are now announcers. Eli Manning is trying not to set the record of the most sideline crying fits.

This is also the third time these two teams meet this year. In the NFL, two teams have played each other three times in one season 53 times. Of those, 27 times has one of the teams held a 2-0 advantage. Teams went 3-0 18 of those 27 games. I like those odds. Thanks to Davidsa14 for researching the numbers.

The entire ESPN cast is saying the Cowboys will lose. No one is picking them. A team that went 13-3 is somehow the underdog to everyone but Vegas. How can this happen? Just because of the slow finish and Tony Romo’s love life? All of that diminishes the power of this team? Hogwash, folks. It’s all hogwash.

Despite Wade Phillips shenanigans, Terrell Owens appears to be recovering and practicing. Tony Romo has rested his bad thumb and his head is relaxed. The defense is rested. How could anyone actually pick the Giants to win this game, a Giants team that has lost its star tight end and center? Plaxico Burress has a bad ankle. Redskins fans are foaming at the mouth, ready to attack me here at the hint of a Cowboys loss. The pressure to win this game is immense.

But why am I not worried? Why am I not a bit concerned anymore?

The answer is simple folks: The Dallas Cowboys are clearly the better team. A sixth Lombardi Trophy is in reach.

Tags: Antonio Pierce Dallas Cowboys Eli Manning New York Giants Phil Sims Plaxico Burress Terrell Owens Tony Romo Troy Aikman

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